7 Steps...

1. Balance
According to the chaos theory, we are all part of a bigger equation; the slightest variation in any aspect would change the whole system irredeemably, forever…
BANG!

2. Pain
So far, I’ve got to the point where I think I hate myself. And it’s not something to be pitied about, it’s just a fact. And I think I hate myself because I’m always finding new ways of feeling pain: I NEED to feel pain, and I need to MAKE ME feel pain. Pain keeps me alert, on the tip of my toes, awakened, sharp. Pain makes me move, gives me strength, courage, raw power, energy. Pain is good. And I hate felling in pain, this constant, unstoppable, everlasting pain, and sometimes is not even pain anymore, just the humming feeling of the adaptation to persistence of pain, which shoots me on the look for new ways of feeling pain. Because, overall, constant stimuli seems to be far less effective than variable stimuli when speaking of negative reinforcement or positive punishment. That delicious, fresh, obsessive dosage of pain. I hate pain. I hate feeling pain.
But the bottom line is, pain is the closest I have to what you could call a friend: it’s always there, it comes when I call it, it appears when I need it, it never disappoints me, it’s unconditional, and at the end of times, it’s the only thing I can rest sure about. Pain is my friend!
And I hate it…

3. Hatred
I hate you.
I plain and simply hate you.
I hate that you are always there for me to hate you.
I hate that you don’t even care to know I hate you.
I hate that you will see this, and still won’t care that I hate you.
I hate every hair of you, every nail of you, every damn brain cell, every fucking fiber of every fucking muscle of your fucking body, I HATE YOU!
I fucking hate you.
I hate to think of you, to remember you, feel you, hear you, touch you, smell you, taste you, breath you, I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!
I hate that I can’t stop hating you.
I hate that I can’t stop …… you.

4. Oblivion
Why can’t I forget?
Why can’t I forget?
Why can’t I forget?
Why can’t I forget¡?
Why can’t I forget?
Why can’t I forget?
Why cant’ I forget?
Why can’t I fogert?}
Why Cant’ I Forget?
Why can’t I forget?
Y can’t I 4get?
Why (the fuck) can’t I forget?
Why can0t I forget?
Why can’t I (fucking) forget?
WHY CAN’T I FORGET?
WHY CANT?=SM TU FMFOEJPWE?=Q?==!#=#=#
WHE CANTI T=I OGORGRT?????????????}
WHFY CANT I FORMGET????????????????????????

5. Silence

6. Reinsertion
I must be good
I must be good (fuckers)
I must be goodI must be (fucking) good
I must be good (DAMN IT!)
I must be good
I must be good (you fucking idiot)
I must be good (you ignorant, no good, dumb fuck, piece of shit)
I must be good
I must be good (fucking A)
I must be good
I MUST BE GOOD…
Damn, I’m good… (cunt)

7. Adaptation
Today I’m happy
Cuz I just bought me a happy mask
Today I’m happy
There’s nothin more to say or ask
It comes with complimentary speech
A monthly visit to mum n dad
A g’nite kiss in the vessels cheeks
A broken heart that beats outta time
Today I’m happy
Cuz I just bought me my happy mask…